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A RP for the sunday show of CSW
cg arsch- Genius Mastermind
- Posts : 92
Join date : 2008-07-03
Age : 40
Location : Germany
cg arsch- Genius Mastermind
- Posts : 92
Join date : 2008-07-03
Age : 40
Location : Germany
The Titantron picks up a signal from CG legendary locker room. The former Brawler’s Champion seems to do some kind of meditation to get ready for his match with the Rogue Rabbit. Suddenly there is a knocking on his door. A slightly annoyed CG gets up to see how bothers to disturb him. As he opens the door, he see three people on the corridor carrying a Christmas tree. Stunned by this strange scenery CG ask one of those guys.
CG: What da hell are you guys doing here?
Nicolas: Putain de merde! Who is this guys?
Victor:Cheers mate! We just wanna celebrate Christmas.
CG: What? Isn’t that a little late?
Victor and Nicolas talk to each other in French while the third guy takes a sip from a bottle with some blackish liquid in it. Suddenly he starts, tackles the fridge which was standing in the corridor and openly displays its interior. He jumps up and screams: WHHHHHHAAATS UP! CG rolls his eyes. Out of nowhere another person appears. He tries to talk to the others in a language that sounds like Czech. As he realized that he is not understood, he switches to English.
Czech Guy: Hey Christmas in heaven. Do you guys want some peanuts.
They takes some.
CG: PEANUTS!!!!????
Suddenly scenes from the past come to his mind. He is standing in a ring surrounded by some Indian dancers. The audience is chanting “TIZ,TIZ”. Right in the middle of the is a huge elephant. CG is handed a bag of peanuts by one of the dancers and is asked to feed the elephant. Even a strange voice without a body is to be witness, which finally convinces CG to do as he was told. With that CG is back in the present and now approaches the Czech guy.
CG: Can I have some of your peanuts?
Czech Guy: Do you have a flag?
CG: What?
Czech Guy:Do you have a flag?
CG:Of course I’m Austrian, I have one in my locker room.
That being said and English guy comes along.
James: There is no Austria!
CG: You wanna get into trouble?
Now the one that tackled the fridge gets up and talks with a slight german accent
Ben:Man, let’s get to the Zone now, because it is not getting better!
Nicolas:Yeah, I love this guys. I want to go to the Zone too.
CG: Zone?
Ben:The best place in the world. It’s outside of the spatio-temporal realm. But I have the ticked that takes you there.
He hands the bottle with the blackish liquid to CG, who takes a sip and immediately starts coughing.
CG: What is it?
James and Ben start singing at once.
James and Ben: The most horrible drink in the world!
We’ve got: Absinthe and Becher,
Vodka and Grappa,
Shock, Cherry and Apple Juice.
Wohohoho the most horrible drink in the world.
Victor:It’s Shocktail!!!
Now all of them start singing:
All: CG, CG, CG, maricon, Maricon, Maricohohn!!!!!!
A half Spanish half French guy with a guitar enter the scene and starts singing as well.
Rafa: I want to fuck a pirate in the arse. I want to fuck a pirate in the arse……
CG is now more than befuddled and wants to leave immediately. Yet he is stopped by a Spanish looking guy.
Duque: Hey you wanna talk to my little friend. Are you bark all day little doggy or are you gonna bite.
CG: What?
Duque:: I always speak the truth even when Iie!
CG:What?
Duque: You say what all the time?
CG: What?
Duque:Do they speak English in What, cabron?
CG snaps and knocks Duque down, but just at this moment another French guy appears with his pants down.
James: Romain, get your pants back up, no one wants to see that!
On binge of insanity CG starts to run.
James:Ah the German army run.
[later on]
Finally CG escapes those maniacs as he enters the cantina. A strange Hungarian cook is preparing anb awful looking soup, while an asian looking guy is preparing something in a Wok.
CG: That looks good, what is that?
Wokguy:Rabbit on Peanuts with fried nuddles.
CG:Very nice, can I have some of these.
Wokguy:You eating whore, this is not for the talent of CSW.
CG:Are you dead yet? My friend, putain, I just want a piece of this delicious meal.
Wokguy:You don’t understand China. You are just as misinformed as everyone else her by western media.
CG(slowly getting angry): Son, are you mentally retarded? Give me a peanut?
Wokguy:They average guy in here is not smarter than a peanut. And now apologizes for you unkind behavior.
CG: I apologize to my nuts and now give me The Peanuts. I need Peanuts now!!!!!
Wokguy shakes his head. A totally enraged CG jumps over the counter and LBO’s the Wokguy into the Wok.
CG:Fucking Bastard. Then I need to buy the expensive ones at the automaton.
The small Hungarian gives a weird look at CG, while she is still trying to save her soup.
[later on, near the automaton]
CG bounces into Jack Maverick.
CG: Hey man, what are you doing here
Jack: Get outta may way and away what are you up to here. You better prepare for your match.
CG: I need to buy TPs
Jack: You bloody idiot, only morons buy TP to get better.
CG: But I need my TPs now, they are sooooooo good.
Jack:It’s those god damn TP buyers that ruined this industry
CG: Come on, what’s your problem with The Peanuts. They are just amaxing!
Jack: What? Anyway I don’t really have the time to talk to a dirty TP-buyer. I’m off.
Jack leaves. CG tries to make it to the automatons yet he is stop again by a guy randomly appearing.
Lionman: Hi I’m Lionman and I’m the new VGM and one of the best wrestlers in the whole industry.
CG: Are you talking to me?
Lionman:…and I’m everybody’s favorite news reporter out here…
CG:Hold on. You are not VGM in CSW and you never will because you SUCK!... and of course you are not one of the best because your build is horrible and you SUCK!...Well, you are everybody’s favorite news reporter, just because you suck. And now get out of the way.
Lionman: I’m the best and now I will Deadmeat you!
CG:Putain, You won’t, because you suck.
CG quickly counters Lionman’s attack attempt, dodges a Clothesline and connects with a LEGENDARY Knock Out Option.
CG: You see, bääääh.. And now to the automatons, I need my peanuts
Finally CG made it to the miraculous automaton and searches his pockets for some coins, yet before he has the chance to insert them he is taken down by an immense force.
CG:Putain, Rags what are you doing here.
Ragnar just releases a devastating roar, kicks the automaton then picks a coin and buys some peanuts.
CG: Ragnar, I stop buying those TPs, you already have enough…
Puzzled by that comment Ragnar turns his head towards CG.
CG:Anyway, it would be nice if you leave some to me, I might even hand your claymore back to you.
Ragnar: I don’t even want it back, I found bigger force, much bigger than you can even imagine.
CG:Ok!!?
CG keeps lying on the floor and waits till Ragnar finishes. Then he slowly gets up and approaches the automaton again. This time his attempt to get Peanuts is successful. He opens the package and grabs some.
CG: Oh yeah, very good this. There was something, was meant to do later. But I just don’t remember.
Right at that moment one of the officials approaches him.
Official: Hey Mr. Arsch, what are you doing here? Your match starts soon, so you better prepare.
CG: Ahhh, that’s it. I gonna fight my old nemesis. Well, Mr. Official, I’m more than prepared now. It’s time for REVENGA!!!!!!!!!!
CG grabs another Peanut and makes his way towards the entrance area
CG: What da hell are you guys doing here?
Nicolas: Putain de merde! Who is this guys?
Victor:Cheers mate! We just wanna celebrate Christmas.
CG: What? Isn’t that a little late?
Victor and Nicolas talk to each other in French while the third guy takes a sip from a bottle with some blackish liquid in it. Suddenly he starts, tackles the fridge which was standing in the corridor and openly displays its interior. He jumps up and screams: WHHHHHHAAATS UP! CG rolls his eyes. Out of nowhere another person appears. He tries to talk to the others in a language that sounds like Czech. As he realized that he is not understood, he switches to English.
Czech Guy: Hey Christmas in heaven. Do you guys want some peanuts.
They takes some.
CG: PEANUTS!!!!????
Suddenly scenes from the past come to his mind. He is standing in a ring surrounded by some Indian dancers. The audience is chanting “TIZ,TIZ”. Right in the middle of the is a huge elephant. CG is handed a bag of peanuts by one of the dancers and is asked to feed the elephant. Even a strange voice without a body is to be witness, which finally convinces CG to do as he was told. With that CG is back in the present and now approaches the Czech guy.
CG: Can I have some of your peanuts?
Czech Guy: Do you have a flag?
CG: What?
Czech Guy:Do you have a flag?
CG:Of course I’m Austrian, I have one in my locker room.
That being said and English guy comes along.
James: There is no Austria!
CG: You wanna get into trouble?
Now the one that tackled the fridge gets up and talks with a slight german accent
Ben:Man, let’s get to the Zone now, because it is not getting better!
Nicolas:Yeah, I love this guys. I want to go to the Zone too.
CG: Zone?
Ben:The best place in the world. It’s outside of the spatio-temporal realm. But I have the ticked that takes you there.
He hands the bottle with the blackish liquid to CG, who takes a sip and immediately starts coughing.
CG: What is it?
James and Ben start singing at once.
James and Ben: The most horrible drink in the world!
We’ve got: Absinthe and Becher,
Vodka and Grappa,
Shock, Cherry and Apple Juice.
Wohohoho the most horrible drink in the world.
Victor:It’s Shocktail!!!
Now all of them start singing:
All: CG, CG, CG, maricon, Maricon, Maricohohn!!!!!!
A half Spanish half French guy with a guitar enter the scene and starts singing as well.
Rafa: I want to fuck a pirate in the arse. I want to fuck a pirate in the arse……
CG is now more than befuddled and wants to leave immediately. Yet he is stopped by a Spanish looking guy.
Duque: Hey you wanna talk to my little friend. Are you bark all day little doggy or are you gonna bite.
CG: What?
Duque:: I always speak the truth even when Iie!
CG:What?
Duque: You say what all the time?
CG: What?
Duque:Do they speak English in What, cabron?
CG snaps and knocks Duque down, but just at this moment another French guy appears with his pants down.
James: Romain, get your pants back up, no one wants to see that!
On binge of insanity CG starts to run.
James:Ah the German army run.
[later on]
Finally CG escapes those maniacs as he enters the cantina. A strange Hungarian cook is preparing anb awful looking soup, while an asian looking guy is preparing something in a Wok.
CG: That looks good, what is that?
Wokguy:Rabbit on Peanuts with fried nuddles.
CG:Very nice, can I have some of these.
Wokguy:You eating whore, this is not for the talent of CSW.
CG:Are you dead yet? My friend, putain, I just want a piece of this delicious meal.
Wokguy:You don’t understand China. You are just as misinformed as everyone else her by western media.
CG(slowly getting angry): Son, are you mentally retarded? Give me a peanut?
Wokguy:They average guy in here is not smarter than a peanut. And now apologizes for you unkind behavior.
CG: I apologize to my nuts and now give me The Peanuts. I need Peanuts now!!!!!
Wokguy shakes his head. A totally enraged CG jumps over the counter and LBO’s the Wokguy into the Wok.
CG:Fucking Bastard. Then I need to buy the expensive ones at the automaton.
The small Hungarian gives a weird look at CG, while she is still trying to save her soup.
[later on, near the automaton]
CG bounces into Jack Maverick.
CG: Hey man, what are you doing here
Jack: Get outta may way and away what are you up to here. You better prepare for your match.
CG: I need to buy TPs
Jack: You bloody idiot, only morons buy TP to get better.
CG: But I need my TPs now, they are sooooooo good.
Jack:It’s those god damn TP buyers that ruined this industry
CG: Come on, what’s your problem with The Peanuts. They are just amaxing!
Jack: What? Anyway I don’t really have the time to talk to a dirty TP-buyer. I’m off.
Jack leaves. CG tries to make it to the automatons yet he is stop again by a guy randomly appearing.
Lionman: Hi I’m Lionman and I’m the new VGM and one of the best wrestlers in the whole industry.
CG: Are you talking to me?
Lionman:…and I’m everybody’s favorite news reporter out here…
CG:Hold on. You are not VGM in CSW and you never will because you SUCK!... and of course you are not one of the best because your build is horrible and you SUCK!...Well, you are everybody’s favorite news reporter, just because you suck. And now get out of the way.
Lionman: I’m the best and now I will Deadmeat you!
CG:Putain, You won’t, because you suck.
CG quickly counters Lionman’s attack attempt, dodges a Clothesline and connects with a LEGENDARY Knock Out Option.
CG: You see, bääääh.. And now to the automatons, I need my peanuts
Finally CG made it to the miraculous automaton and searches his pockets for some coins, yet before he has the chance to insert them he is taken down by an immense force.
CG:Putain, Rags what are you doing here.
Ragnar just releases a devastating roar, kicks the automaton then picks a coin and buys some peanuts.
CG: Ragnar, I stop buying those TPs, you already have enough…
Puzzled by that comment Ragnar turns his head towards CG.
CG:Anyway, it would be nice if you leave some to me, I might even hand your claymore back to you.
Ragnar: I don’t even want it back, I found bigger force, much bigger than you can even imagine.
CG:Ok!!?
CG keeps lying on the floor and waits till Ragnar finishes. Then he slowly gets up and approaches the automaton again. This time his attempt to get Peanuts is successful. He opens the package and grabs some.
CG: Oh yeah, very good this. There was something, was meant to do later. But I just don’t remember.
Right at that moment one of the officials approaches him.
Official: Hey Mr. Arsch, what are you doing here? Your match starts soon, so you better prepare.
CG: Ahhh, that’s it. I gonna fight my old nemesis. Well, Mr. Official, I’m more than prepared now. It’s time for REVENGA!!!!!!!!!!
CG grabs another Peanut and makes his way towards the entrance area
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